Today I found out my cousin is an MMORPG missionary and that apparently MMORPG missionaries are a thing.  I shouldn’t even be surprised.  The only way this could be better if it was Second Life.

Today I found out my cousin is an MMORPG missionary and that apparently MMORPG missionaries are a thing.  I shouldn’t even be surprised.  The only way this could be better if it was Second Life.

rwby-rose:

vaguelyjewish:

testoster0ne:

how do woman not orgasm when inserting tampons.

like isn’t just like having sex idgi?

This sounds like a Mitt Romney diary entry.

how do men not orgasm when putting on a condom

like isn’t just like having sex idgi?

Do you have any fucking idea how much tampons would cost if they made you come?

(Source: basedyeeezus, via coffees-and-cats)

deerhoof:

the future is here and it’s horrible

"To be fair, teaching a robot comic timing is more impressive than teaching it motion." — delcat

(Source: pierregrassou, via coffees-and-cats)

delcat:

I’m printing this out for my appointment tomorrow.  Bam.  Official recall.  You are federally obligated to remove this from my body before it produces a child and immediately chokes it sirs

delcat:

I’m printing this out for my appointment tomorrow.  Bam.  Official recall.  You are federally obligated to remove this from my body before it produces a child and immediately chokes it sirs

delcat:

lvrnemalvo:

monobeartheater:

arcticmowsy:

aerostarmonk:

The man entered his home and was absolutely delighted when he discovered someone had stolen every lamp in the house.

oh my god

i just do not understand this post what even

OH MY FUCKING GOD

My family and I played this game for an entire car ride once except my father did not get it

Mom: If an electrician lost his job, would he be delighted?
Megan: If a lawyer lost his job, would he be debriefed?
Me: If Beethoven lost his job, would he be decomposed?
Dad: If a plumber lost his job, would he be out of luck?

like seriously genuinely did not get it at all

also I understand now why Mom went “MEGAN” really loudly when she riffed on the florist

misandry-mermaid:

onthesideoftheotters:

bodysexgender:

vexednature:

tuxedoandex:

modernvampiresofnewyork:

What girls look for in guys

  • brown eyes
  • messy hair
  • cute nose
  • 4 paws
  • golden retriever 

but a man looking for a certain thing in girls? misogyny right? guys can’t be like “I look for girls who wear glasses and are thin and like to talk” nope that’s misogyny and it’s horrible. “equality”

oh my god did you even bother reading the post -______-

"not ALL dogs"

m’owner

image

"Who’s a good boy?"

"DON’T YOU FRIENDZONE ME."

"He got drunk and said a few things, but we’ve all said those things." No, Gary Oldman, this may come as a shock to you but some of us have actually never gone on volatile anti-Semitic tirades even when very drunk.  Thanks for revealing a lot about the kind of company you keep, though.

(Source: think-progress, via ramadiiwolf)

jerkstorecalling:

waverace64:

did-you-kno:

Source 

it also is responsible for consolidation of long term memory and ur sense of smell but yeah just get rid of ur amygdala

Lifehack: Get a fucking lobotomy

did-you-kno now run by a smirking Hannibal Lecter.

jerkstorecalling:

waverace64:

did-you-kno:

Source 

it also is responsible for consolidation of long term memory and ur sense of smell but yeah just get rid of ur amygdala

Lifehack: Get a fucking lobotomy

did-you-kno now run by a smirking Hannibal Lecter.

(via librariansoul)

lowbudgetbeasts:


Some fine work was put into this low-budget Beast ensemble- complete with a chin resembling testicles and a Belle I’m not convinced isn’t a cardboard cutout.


I’m thrilled that this is a blog that exists.

lowbudgetbeasts:

Some fine work was put into this low-budget Beast ensemble- complete with a chin resembling testicles and a Belle I’m not convinced isn’t a cardboard cutout.

I’m thrilled that this is a blog that exists.

(via yodelmachine)